Let’s be honest: saying “no” is hard.
But thinking of it as protecting your “yes” might help.
In a fast-paced, go-go-go, and people-pleasing world, there is always something to be involved in or part of.
Fear of missing out (FOMO) plagues people from their workplaces to their homes. Many of us find safety in numbers or in feeling accepted. Others feel bad not participating and play the humble advocate with their presence when, in actuality, they don’t want to be a part.
In these moments, we do not realize that for every “yes” we give to something, we consequently say “no” to something else. Most of the time, something of more value to us.
I have wrestled with this complexity in recent years as clubs, organizations, and people catch my eye or ask for my time. I have found myself thinking, “I guess I could make it,” or “It would be really fun.”
I reached a point where I realized I was doing all the right things on paper but was losing myself to work that wasn’t my own.
My mindset shifted when my mother encouraged me to start protecting my “yes” instead.
I began saying “no” to certain people, places, and clubs, knowing it wasn’t a loss but an investment. I wasn’t saying “no” to them for the sake of it; rather, I was wisely choosing to invest that “yes” into projects and work that edified and brought life to me and those around me.
Always be ambitious, try new things, and stretch your limits, but never lose yourself to work that’s not your own.
Protecting your “yes” might be the most significant small decision you ever make.
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